24 April 2006

there might well be something wrong with me

When I am writing on a serious project, there's this pair of voices doing bad vaudeville jokes in the back of my brain.

My conscious mind will be clenched into a fist, trying to squeeze artistic blood from the creative turnip, and meanwhile Shecky and Mo are sniggering from the back row like Beavis and Butthead channeling the The Old Guys in The Muppet Show.

I'm reluctant to even mention this in public, as the three or seven times I've previously described this odd situation to real life friends, I get this look of genuine concern and confusion, like I just happened to say "oh, by the way-- my doc says I have smallpox. Pass the ketchup."

Still, sometimes the annoying bastards say something that makes me laugh (like they did a minute ago, hurling a painfully childish dirty pun at me which I had to write down for possible future use), and at those points I have to turn around inside my head and wave at them to settle down before they get us all into trouble. But still...

Is this strange?

Curious Larger Question: if you were truly and deeply disturbed, would you even be able to notice it? Or would what you call normal only seem odd or abnormal to everyone else and would seem absolutely unremarkable to you?

Talk amongst yourselves. *I* always do.
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yours in good mental hygiene B

10 comments:

suzbays said...

No, it's not strange...for a writer. I don't know how other people function, but I think it's SOP for writers to have conflicting voices in their heads.

Julie O. said...

Suz is right.

But I wouldn't rule out there being something wrong with Brett.

Brett said...

Great. Like I'm going to put a lot of stock in responses from YOU two....
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B

A. M. said...

Go write a funny scene for your "future use" file. Or comic relief for the drama. Are your friends who give you strange looks writers? If not, they don't count. Does that answer your question?

Q1: Are the thumbtacks still "in the mail"?

Q2: Is it possible to copy and paste progress-bar code into site without having to consult w/a mathematical genius?
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A.M. not afraid to make fool of self. New mantra.

Brett said...

Hey. I'm writing all day long -- I'm just not at the keyboard when I do a lot of this writing.

A1 -- the thumbtacks have arrived. Very exciting.

A2 -- the progress bar stuff is very easy. Drop me an email (brettman(at)consolidated(dot)net) and I'll send the code, and even offer as much explanation as I can think of.
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B

A. M. said...

It works! It does work! Hey, you are a bucket of love. In your honor blares (on the headset, of course) Led Zeppelin's "Moby Dick" - best drumroll ever.

Thanky! :)

Patrick J. Rodio said...

I feel that way too. But the fact that we acknowledge taht we have those thoughts, and aren't oblivious to them, I think taht means we're ok.

Or Nuts.

Fun Joel said...

When I was writing a D2DVD type horror script, whenever I got to the most grisly parts, I heard funny lines coming out of the bad guy's mouth. In part, I certainly attribute this to years of Nightmare on Elm Street, Terminator, and assorted ripoffs. But at the same time, I also attributed it to my being slightly uncomfortable in this writing situation, and more comfortable with comedy. I like comedy more. And when I set out to write that script I didn't want a wisecracking villain, and i think that letting myself put them in hurt the script and will need to be excised. So I encourage you to reign yourself in, but don't think you're weird for hearing those voices! I find it totally normal. It could be a mechanism for dealing with uncomfortable material.

Fun Joel said...

And BTW, not sure if I ever mentioned this, but I love 1941.

Brett said...

I think I hear the same sorts of voices that Raimi and Campbell must have heard when working on the original EVIL DEAD (which I refuse to watch) and which led to the insane EVIL DEAD II (which I adore)-- there's a fine line between scary and silly, and sometimes it's hard to resist the urge to hop back and forth over that line.

That being said, what I'm working is not straight horror (which I just don't like anyway), but more a horror inflected genre piece which occasionally allows for a darkly humorous moment.

And 1941 will forever reign as a beautifully flawed piece of twisted genius.

"Japs? REAL Japs?"

"Nah-- WOODEN Japs, cheeto!"

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B